667 Right next Door to Hell|
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
He Whose Name Shall Not Be Spoken's LiveJournal:
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|Wednesday, September 3rd, 2008|
of a out of control fantasy football team name, we win cash and prizes for best name...
|Tuesday, February 26th, 2008|
|2 random thoughts, but it turned into nonsense
I was sitting at the office tonight, and they were showing that stupid ass competitive eating rubbish, and a light bulb went off in my head, and I wondered why there is not a competitive drinking league, I know Id get booked for that, hell,I know I can smoke everyone in state save for possibly ryan, ( i gotta catch him on a bad day) and hak, hak wakes up with a .679 blood alcohol level, and on may 10th its drunk vs drunk Sebastian Dark vs Sandman in kingston,pa. its gonna be spectacular. 3 months notice, Im not used to that, I usually wait for Spiker to see it on a website.
on the 2nd thought,
I know some friends like him, but I just dont get it,
Jack Black is not funny, I dont get it, the boat left and I wasn't on the boat, explain it to me, I put Jacko in the same boat as Sandler, Ben Stiller,and Jim Carey, how you get booked to pretty much be the same guy in EVERY movie, save for a few minor changes , and people still go to theses movies amazes the shit out of, Steve Carell(sp) is on the same path.
Its also sad to say that Will Farrell is on that road too, and that makes me sad, because in reality, he is the same as the above mentioned, hes just actually ..whats the word... umm. oh yea, Funny.
Maybe in my drunken dillusions I dont see it, and I dont think I ever will.
Its like listening to Dave matthews , the same shitty sound with the same shitty lyrics, and he included shitty dancing, he just needs to die really, and not in some tragic way so fans can cry about him, someone needs to build a time machine go back in time, and punch his mom in the stomach 666 times in her 8 month of labor. Fuck I hate him
Im on a slow path to Rageville soon, I feel it slowly burning and ill prob stub my toe in like 2 hours and put my hand through drywall.
I can feel it. and I dont know why. maybe its because im sober today, maybe its the fact that im sober today, maybe its that my car is crap, and will cost me about 7 bills to fix AGAIN. maybe its the fact that I like in a nice house in the middle of nowhere, 6 acers, but because i like in the dark ages Im typing this on motherfucking dial up. because no cell network works here, and when the city about 20 miles away get 4 in of snow, I get fucking 15.Maybe its that every show I do is at least 3 hours away, and gas is $3.54 here.
I had a job offer in manhattan, and one near philly that I can take coz I started school in jan, that makes me sad too, coz it would have ruled to move either place, philly I can punch Mcnabb, and NY, i can stack Jeremy Shockey, and Eli Manning and jump off the statue of liberty with the biggest Ghetto stomp EVER!!
"bad boys bad boys whatca gonna do, whatca gonna do when they come for you" ( cops just came on in the background)
If I were Roger Clemens Id go all Jack Nicholson from a few good men and go "Youre damn right I did steroids, it got me filthy rich, championships, and you can shove the HoF up your ass"
Fuck the mans loaded, who cares what his legacy will be,
Hes rich, bitch.
Id also like to say, GO METS.
Do farts have lumps?
one time I made "teddy Ruxpin" do bad things to my cousins "Kid Sister" doll. She was a slut, not my coz, the doll.
Do you know for $15 you can be a minister in the universal life church, and then you can make anyone a saint for $10? I do....
I just needed a moment, so I ate a twix bar, and time didnt stop like in the commericals, coz if it did, Id be eating twix a lot during sexual encounters.
I wish Iron Maiden was still touring, I wish I had a 7 ft tall Eddie costume from the "Number of the Beast" album. Steve harris, best bassist ever.
( I wonder how this would all be if i was loaded?)
I think Im done now.
you want that 15 min of wasted time. ( wasted time, great skid row song) ok now 16 min of that time back, Ill take you out for a drink if you do.
|Saturday, February 16th, 2008|
i talked to macky on AOLIM tonight, he misses Sam, Joe, Ryan, and noah
and dammit so do it
|Monday, February 4th, 2008|
|Every year at this time I die a little more inside
Because now that football season is officially over ( no the pro bowl DOES NOT COUNT). It invites the plague that is on us for over 8 months, and even when football return, it still makes me sad, and that plague is...
god help us all
Id rather watch an 8 month marathon of the snorks and fraggle rock.
wait, no Id prob watch that anyways
fuck nascar Ill drink to more fatalities on turn 2, well maybe not fatalities, just career ending accidents
|Sunday, September 9th, 2007|
My dear love, I do aplolgize for my love affair, I cheated on you, and for that I will be forever sorry, I was blinded by propaganda, and ballyhoo. I cheated on you, I left you for another, and will never ever
do it again.. ( Im full of shit, yes will ). Im sorry America, for leaveing you for a dirty whore, named Canada.
Thats how I felt when I returned over the border form Canada, at 4 am. But that not the story read more for the whole boring story. You already clicked the link to read this, so fuck it.. read on.....
I started my adventure ar around 10 am saturday morning, excited at the fact that, I will actually get to spend time outside of the Toronto airport, this would be the 1st time I actually crossed the border in an automobile.The drive itself was utterly boring and uneventful. The only highlight was, the fact that the roads in NY were actually smooth roads and not, I repeat NOT the 230 miles of rumblestrips and potholes that the I-81 is in PA. Outside of that NY drivers are moreover speed limit following pussys, and I have road rage, so that did not sit well with me. Many variations of the "Fuck" word was pouring out from my liquored ruined voice box.
On a side note more proof that PA is retarted, I drove 138 miles on a I-90 in NY a tool road, it costs me $5.10. To drive from Carsile to New Stanton, roughly 150 miles, its a whopping 10-by-god-damn-fuck me in the ass and not give ame a reacharound-dollars. WTF
So 5 hours of driving and Howard Stern go by and I find myself sitting in line at the border, in the wrong lane, the lane for tractor trailers mind you, and coulndt get out, because the Royal Canadian Mounted Douchebags ( RCMD ) wait to warn you to be in the left lane about 30 seconds form the checkpoint. So I cut off some old lady who I swear to God, babysat Jesus. So now I'm sitting in the 3rd lane out of 7 at the border, and for some reason all caars to the left and the right are going by me, yet my line moves not at all. I lok to my Co-Piolt and said, basically that we must have the pain in the ass in the booth. Well FINALLY I get to the booth, and this miserable Old bag with curly red hair and really weathered skin ( skin like on a 30 year old woman who tans entirely too much ) starts asking the normal questions .....One question being
" Do you work? I answer no," I dont ma'am" To which she asks " Why dont you work? " in this really miserable voice.
What business is it of hers to even ask that question, I can be independently wealthy, I can be handicapped, I can be a trust-fund baby, not everyone needs employment.....
So I answer. " I dont want to, nor do I need to, what does this have to do with anything? "
Then she proceeds to ask me in a 3 min. time frame How long I am going to be in the country. Which was 1-2 days depending on if I get drunk tonight. I wasn't being a smart ass ( yet!.. Ill get to that ) So she asks again, now anyone who knows me I loathe stupid people. So now I'm getting pissed, and the next time she asked me I told her .....
" Do I have a stutter, or are you just a little slow ? This is the 5th time Im telling you 1-2 days, are you a retarted or just hard of hearing? ( which I also gave her the sing language version of 1 -2 on the fingers of my hand incase she was like Helen Keller )
I already knew I was going to get searched, so i didnt care what I said to her, and guess what.. I got to go visit the customs office....
Walking into the office I was polite, the prior events were not this guys fault, so no need to be a dick. Gave him my passport, he ran it through, gave it back, then I asked him to use the mens room, ( Yes even I have to pee sometimes ) He gave me this yellow paper like a hall pass, and told me to give it to the fat man outside. I did then he get this...... PATS me down like Im Kindgom James getting pulled over in NY after having a warrant out for my arrest.
" What the Fuck are you doing ?" I ask.
" Lookin for weapons and drugs now be quiet, sir"
SO after he figures out Im not threat , allows me to potty, to which he stands BEHIND me watching......
I had to do it... I had to say it...
" You know if you stand to the side and not behind me, you can get a better view, but get close, I only have about 3 inches to work with"
he said nothing....
Back outside we go and he asks me to unlock the car and sand on the curb while they search it. OK whatever....
After the search is done, which they trashed my moms car, ripped the panels off the back, didnt put anything back, then walks to me and asks
" Whos car is this?'
" My Moms." and I gave him her name.
" Does she know you have it, and you are taking it to canada?"
" Yes, why wouldnt she, do you think Im stupid enough to steal my own mothers car, then try to come across the border with it? "
Just shook his head, and said you are free to go... It gets a little better
Get to the next toll booth, and its $3 to get in... no problem right. Well I crossed over in Niagara Falls, and if you cross there you know this too.. The road into Canada was the closest thing to a dirt road without having dirt. Just wide enough to fit a car, and one lane. I paid 3 buck for this? holy hell..
Canada is not what I really expected. I expected candycane roads, and lollipop waterfalls. Munchkins waving to you from the side of the road. All I saw was construction, and slow driving, and something called a kilometer, whatever the hell that is. No cotton candy clouds, no bananna cream pie fields.. Just construction, and bad driving.
They do have cool cop cars, though. It has a Knight Rider-esq red light in the front grill.
This whole trip was to go and be part of a promotion I was the 1st ever Chamipon for " The Union " "UIPW"
www.wrestlersunion.ca ( I get 20 bucks every time i shill it)..
So I get to the venue, see some IWC guys, SJK goads me into buying him a beer, ( hell hes in a stable with me, so that is worth a beer, it raises my stock exponentially.I lookmore important just being in the ring at the same time... even if just by assocation )..
Beer was $3.75 for domestic.. If this is the way a country get universal healthcare, by jacking the price of beer, then fuck the people who need health care, dont fuck with my beer prices.. thats bullshit bad enough its $4 and change for gas.
3 beers later its time for the show. I wont really get into that, as if you go to
www.wrestlersunion.ca ( cha-ching ) you can read the results there. of dont be cheap, and order the DVD which you can get soon at
www.wrestlersunion.ca ( $$$$ )
The ride back home to the border was less than stelar, got to the border, and ever fiber of my being wanted me to get out of the car, and leave a steaming pile of fiber right on the border to show my love for this place, but I didnt have to go, so I didnt, I could have T-Bagged Canada though. that was an afterthough.
Got to the border... was at the booth for about 2 min, and done.. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!!!
Got home around 9ish, didnt sleep, went to the bar to watch the football games, listened to ESPN blow smoke up our ass by saying Big Ben is back to the Ben that was in the Superbowl, well if that was true, Ben would have had zero passing touchdowns, and one rushing TD, that really wasnt a TD.
Ben had 4 yesterday, I hope he gets cancer of the face soon, but he wont coz the pavement and the car he rode into illeglly on his unliscenced bike, made his faceinto a metal face, with a pasted on facial hair..
so in closing... The show was fun.. Thanks to AKJ for giving me a spot.
canada was not very fun, bad roads, and bad grammar. miserable border patrol, and overpriced gas/beer
I will return, I have to show those Canadian sissys how to actually consume alcohol. Its the one thing Im truly good at...
|Wednesday, August 29th, 2007|
|Its not easy.. found that out
This one is called "Name Ten Songs Begining with this letter and tell me why they made this list" meme. I got the play in from
1. "Head Like a Hole":
Nine Inch Nails. It just fires me up, I dare anyone to NOT get angry and want to step on babies heads, and push handicapped people into the street.
2. "Hector's Final Hour"
: Man O War Its part of " Achilles,Agony,and Ecstasy in Eight Parts "
off the Triumph Of Steel
album. Its the story of Hector and Achilles its a 24 min song broken into 8 parts, and this is the part Where hector is killed and is dragged around the battle field. I highly recommend listening to this entire song.
3. "Hangar 18"
Megadeth : Drugged up Dave Mustane is Good Dave Mustane
4. "Hail The Leaf "
DOWN : Its just an awesome song from back in 95. about smopking weed and what not, but Its a great change from Pantera Phil good song for the gym.
5. " Heresy "
Pantera : Not the best Pantera song, but its the only one I can think off off my head with H
6. "House of Fire"
: Alice Cooper: Lets build a house of fire baby!!! for a " shock horror type gimmick.. the man is and was actually very talented, and had an ass load of good songs.
7. "Heading for a Heartbreak"
Def Leppard : Further proof that a drummer with 2 arms will always be better than a one-armed drummer.
8. "Hollywood Vampires"
L.A. Guns : Yes I said LA Guns, love it you shall.. they were fantastic.
9. "Hallowed Be Thy Name"
Iron Maiden : You knew they would make the list, Bruce Dickinson at his best.
10. " Hangin Tough "
N.K.O.T.B : kidding HAHAHA you know you were singing it in your adolesence
10b. "The Halloween Theme":
I think Its self-explainatory
who shall be next on this fine adventure?
|Monday, July 30th, 2007|
|Since Im going to hell anyways
Thank you Michael Vick. If it was not for you and your shennanigans , I could utter the following phrase to my idiot dog..
" Knock it off or Im going to send you to Michael Vick's house! "
It seems to calm him right down..
Thank you Michael Vick
Oh and I hope Barry Bonds hits his next homerun so damn far that he hits Hank Aaron right in the mouth with the ball while he is pooing on his toilet home in Georiga
|Tuesday, April 24th, 2007|
| Its time
For those of you NOT away by now, i have decided ( in my drunken wisdom ) to rid this world of that " total gym" shilling Chuck Norris. I have gone to my agent kingdomjames
to get this fight sanctioned and booked.
Ladies and gentlemen, he needs a beating, and I will give him one, its time for Walker to get on his walker and wobble off into the nearest adult day care facility along with nash Bridges and that freak of nature tony little...
now i sleep
|Tuesday, April 3rd, 2007|
Amongst my drunken retardation tonight, a discussion was brought up about the best bassist in the metal industry. now if you know me.. you know who I am picking already. but in an honest opinion, who wins.
Geddy Lee ( sp. Im drunk)
while you discuss, Im off to Reno Nv, to beat up a few greenhorns, then to gamble for 4 days beacuse, well Im better than you all, well not all of you, im not better than Kingdom, Doe, Ryan, or Mr Jaggers, Bobby Jaggers that is. hooahhh If chuck roberts ever answered txts messages he would be in that group too. but he dosent. Current Mood: giddy
|Sunday, March 4th, 2007|
I recently found myself watching "episode 6" Star Wars, and outside of me freaking out that they redid the ending, and super imposed the douche who played Anakin in the finish, instead of the guy who was darth vader .
But it raises a question.
They said that Luke was the chosen one, because he will bring peace to the force, the same was said of his father, but really Luke was just a big pussy who just stayed on the floor while Vader did the face turn, and chucked the emperor in the pit.
So really Juke was nothing, and Obi wan was correct, and Vader was the chosen one all the time, coz technically Vader was the one after all who finally brought peace to the force..
henna or no?
|Thursday, March 1st, 2007|
The fuck is wrong with the majority of you steeler fans, know I know for the most part you all have been hardcore fans, but this is the type of douche-tastic shit I have to deal with when something dosent go your way. It makes you look like bandwagon jumpers. Like bitching about Ben when he was sucking last season., and BTW BEN DOES SUCK, I could have taken the steelers to the superbowl with the offensive line he had that year. Ben in any other offensive system outside of the steelers he would suck worse than he is now. and why he got a free pass, this year because of the accident, ( which would have never happened if that asshole wasnt on a bike he didnt have a liscense for in the 1st place) is dumbfounding. Then the appindectimy. Ok thats cool, but blame that big chinned retard for playing him too damn soon. Dont blame Ben ( and mark this down, I will never defend that douche rocket ever again ).
But now the line isnt the same, ben shows his true self, and you turn, you give him the tommy maddox treatment, who didnt suck, just didnt have a line, and we.. lll played like Ben did this year, And fuck you now, and take me off your freinds list if you can honestly say you DIDNT cheer Maddox when he saved you from Cordell. and now all i hear is bitching coz Porter was released, well you are supposed to be a fan of the TEAM, not single people, you have faith in a team, not one guy. This is why I hate the steelers, not of the talent on the team, the ignorance I have to hear at the bar, and everywhere else, because of the think they know it all fans, who dont know anything, ANYONE who says maddox sucks because on one pick he threw which lost a game, ( and BTW Mcnabb threw the same pic a few weeks later, and even the philly fans were cool with it, same short pass picked and taken back, and these are asshole eagles fans, geta grip even bradshaw wasnt that good, if anything was ever more true, in the Era of bradshaw, Defense wins Championships, was never more true!
look at all of the " All of a sudden Penguins fans" you have now, since they are playing well..
Stop making excuses, Ive been a Mets, Broncos, and Avalanche ( Oilers) fan for 20 years, never made any excuses, other than " we sucked " today, you dont see me throwing jake under the bus coz he sucked in the AFC championship last year, all I said was our D wasnt doing what they normally did, and it bit us in the ass.. Or we didnt win a World Series coz Dwight Gooden and Darryl Strawberry were hyped up on coke. I support the team. .
Fuck this Im drunk you bandwagon jumpers piss me off, Im drunk, and Im drunk. and if you didnt know.. dammit Im drunk
i hope the fleas of 1,000 camels infest all of your pubic areas
|Monday, November 13th, 2006|
Worked Low Ki and Rickey Reyes, over the weekend w/ Doe, I would be lying if I thought I may be in line for the Dam Maff treatment form Ki, but it wasnt to be. I was excited and nervous at the same time, I dont get many oppertunities to do shit w/ bigger names, until i did IWC, I have been treated well there, but this Im my mind was the biggest names I have done, and I didnt want to screw it up, and for the most part It went off real well, I was really happy with it, and was Doe, whos new job only has one downfall, Im not there, he has the best boss EVER... E V E R!!!!
pretty much I am a happy man this week.
and oh yeah.. I met jay Pheonix.
|Friday, November 10th, 2006|
|drunken quiz time
In respect to the upcoming 7/07 Live action Transformers movie.. I pose this question.. it was a question that befuzzeled us for quite some time tonite, coz we are drunken idiots. its rather very easy..
there is only one rule to this. and that is, " This is on the honor system, no googling, yahooing, asking that asshole jeeves ect... this is purely based on yout transformer knowledge. you are only cheating yourself if you look it up.
and now the question...
What is the name of the pinkish white cubes the transformers fought over, and used for fuel?
|Wednesday, October 11th, 2006|
any one else see the Spike TV UFC Ortiz/Shamrock 3? and if you did, when they did the mutual respect gimmick at the end, wernt you just begging for Shamrock to heel out and kick him?
|Friday, September 29th, 2006|
I love pain killers and booze. I've never pulled a T.O. He's a douche.
|Wednesday, September 27th, 2006|
|Speaking of Star Trek...
This conversation started with the Sheep Fuckers after the IWC show this month, and it has reared its ugly head again, so i bring it to you, the Dorks like me who actually watch this hooie.
Who is a better captian,
James T Kirk
if you say Janeway or that fucker that Scott Bakula ( who was the shittiest capt EVER)
played I will rip your canadian heart out. :)
|Wednesday, September 13th, 2006|
|Tuesday, August 29th, 2006|
|It all makes sense now!!
Im @ my mothers house for the night, coz well I have laundry, and now washer dryer, but thats not the point of this.
I just found out tonight that when I was born, I didnt have a flippin name for 3 days, 3 fucking days, but that time God had the plants and the trees, in 3 days jesus faked his death and holed himself up to go on a 3 day crack and wine bender. then he emerged and everyone loved him!!
Upon this I was also born 7 lbs 7 oz and my idiot father wanted to name me Segrams!!!
so I think I was born into drinking, I think my issues stem out of the min I shot out of birth canal. Fuck. I need a brew..
|Tuesday, August 15th, 2006|
Fuck you Curt Cobain. the life of a real artist needs to be celebrated Evlis Died 29 yeas ago today.. go out drink eat some red meat. and be erry celebrate the life of a true musician, not of one who shot himself. sure elvis died coz he was a fat fuck, at least he didnt eat a bullet...
fuck curt cobain
|Fuck Curt Cobain.. These deaths Meant something
RIP Jerry Garcia.. and if I dont post tommrow RIP Elvis.. 2 big drunken days ahead of me. and this just tops it off. to steal from Ryan.. Im at a breaking point, and Im ready to go all Ken shamrock..
yes the big fat stupid no workrate drunk has feelings, and hes gonna kill someone soon..